What's Up!

April 9, 2009


url: http://whatsup.dmounited.com/x/2009-0409.html

A rapid fire dose of things on my mind.

- I said it two and a half weeks ago, and I'll say it again: After watching the finale of Battlestar Galactica, I feel that Gaius Baltar ended up as the hero of the whole damn thing. And here's another thing to wrap your head around: You had the deities of the "good guys," and you had the deity of the "bad guys." The winner seemed to be the deity of the antagonists. Chew on that.

- Would you spend $30 per person for all you could eat ribs?

- I am surprised at the incredibly rapid fall of MySpace. It's still around and has its fans, but the exodus of users over to Facebook has been stunning.

- I am quite pleased that U2 still cranks out good music. But you know, they're are close to the time where they might just pull a "Rolling Stones, and put out an album of mediocre quality, as an excuse to tour. Am I wrong? Name three singles from the last three Stones' CDs that went mainstream. Really? I'd like to know.
- For the record, I liked U2's "Pop."
- Am I the only one that thinks Guitar Hero and Rock Band are saturating the market? I love these games, but I can't possibly be expected to buy all 35 Guitar Hero games out there (yes, I'm exaggerating, but not by much). Now if they released Emo Hero: The Smiths, that might be something.

- Do yourselves a favor: don't listen to anyone who tells you the economic recovery will begin this year. Second half of 2010, at the EARLIEST. Plan accordingly.

- Here's a quick health tip. Don't eat a half bag of Cheetos before you go running. They make the part of the body they are in, bounce in the opposite direction that the rest of your body is going in. And it feels super weird.

- A couple of issues ago, right here in What's Up, I said that the best thing for soccer would be to add Portland and Vancouver. MLS agreed. Both got the expansion teams. Can I say I called it?

- Yes, more Zoe pictures are coming. Step off.

- It's amazing, now after seing a few newborns in the last couple of weeks, to see what babies are supposed to look like when their 1-3 months old, as opposed to the leviathan that Val gave birth to. Check it, Zoe's isn't even a year old, and is two inches away from riding on the Matterhorn. Boom!

-Check out this old newspaper ad for Disneyland. This would never run nowadays because someone would complain that it's demeaning to people with holes in their head. And don't you dare deny it. You know I speak the truth.

- Another reason I worry about humanity: I'm looking at jogging strollers (I'm starting to run, and I've got a baby), and I'm reading reviews for different models. On fixed-front-wheeled models, the number one complaint is that it doesn't turn easily. People, it has a fraking FIXED wheel, as in it is locked into place and does not turn. Didn't you realize that when you bought it? Morons. And they're breeding, too.

- It's been odd to hear people tell me, out of the blue, that they like chocolate AND peanut butter. Then I realized that they had read the What's Up! piece below, and were using it as a catchphrase to signal their agreement with me.

- As I type this, I opened up iTunes, hit Radio, selected Dance, and picked the first station which is ABF Clubbing, with the description of "Paris Electro Spirit Live From FRANCE | Dance & House Hits - Powered by RadioABF.net" Not a bad mix. Of course, I do enjoy what the Mrs. likes to call, "EuroGay." You know, bizarrely European dance music you'd hear in a gay club. Not that I've been in a European gay dance club and seen an unnatural amount of glistening abs or anything.

- Speaking of iTunes, I think I have music in at least a dozen languages in ours. Not that you care.

- Y'all saw that I add the new Iron Chef America - The Drinking Game, right?

Now begins baby daughter play time. Peach out.

(i was originally going to type "peace out" but "peach out" works, too. Let's see if we can start something new)

What's Up!

February 21, 2009


url: http://whatsup.dmounited.com/x/2009-0221.html

Stand back. I've got a serious issue of What's Up!, and it's politically charged. Sort of.

The Obama presidency raises an interesting question. Did Obama win because he was Barack Obama, or did he win because it was the non-Republican? Truthfully, it's probably a combination of both. But I'm not going to lie to you, if the Democrats had their mascot on the ballot, as in an actual donkey, it may have still won the election (dependent of course, if the donkey is at least 35 years of age. Constitutional rule). That's how bad the view of the Grand Old Party was/is.

In the spirit of disclosure, I voted for Obama because he was... not the Republican. But please don't think I'm partyliner for the Democrats. Quite the opposite. I do like John McCain, and in the 8 years I've been eligible to vote, I've changed my party affiliation several times (being at least at one point in my life, a registered Republican, a registered Democrat, and a registered Reform Party-ian. Yes, I voted for Ross Perot... twice).

Grover Cleveland was the 22nd AND the 24th President of the United States of America.
Look it up.

The reason for my vote, I think, is a microcosm of what's wrong with American politics. People will vote, not because they like a candidate, but because that candidate belongs to a certain political party. A Republican-controlled government has held the reigns of power for the last 8 years, and look where it got us. I look at that and I think, "Do I want to continue down that path?" So I vote for the Democrat. If that Democrat was Hilary Clinton or John Edwards or the ghost of Grover Cleveland, I would have voted for her/him/the undead one.

But truthfully, was Obama the best choice? The Mrs. half-jokingly/half-seriously calls Barack the Anti-Christ, on speaking ability and charisma alone (and if that's the case, it's not a bad thing, because Jesus makes a comeback after 7 years of tribulations, which is, by last count, a year shorter than the Bush administration). The clamoring that Obama is a Marxist and a socialist probably aren't too off the mark (and this doesn't bother me that much because I'm a socialist on some days). Will taxes rise? Probably. Will we see an unnatural growth of government? Maybe. And I still voted for the guy.

John McCain isn't a bad guy, but he tries too hard to appeal to everyone. It's tough to be a maverick when you're going around telling everyone you're a maverick. And the main reason I didn't vote for John McCain is because I didn't want Republicans to think that the ship was NOT sinking. They shouldn't feel justified or redeemed for the efforts of the last 6 years.

So my choice: Comrade Barack or "Business as Usual"

My point: We need a third party.

Let me rephrase that. We need a third party that isn't a fragment of the existing two parties.

The Reform Party was almost like that. Ross Perot built enough support for the party to be taken seriously, and don't forget, Jesse "The Body" Ventura was elected governor of Minnesota as a Reform Party candidate. Unfortunately, the party was hijacked by renegade Republicans, and is in shambles. The Green Party (which got a lot of good press with the 2000 Nader run) remains too far in the Democratic half of the spectrum to do any good. What we truly need is, what I like to call, the Central Moderate Party.

The current political parties, and to some extent, the media, have really painted the picture that you're either left of right, blue or red, liberal or conservative. But what about if you're both? You deemed a moderate, and that's a bad word in both political parties. In their view, you're either with them, or against them. What happens when you fall in the middle? The world says you can like either chocolate OR peanut butter. But what if you like chocolate AND peanut butter? What party do the Reese's Peanut Butter Cups of the world sign up for?

Can the nation have a party made of people who are moderately minded? People who willingly "reach across the aisle" because they like the ideas on both sides of it.

In the current political mold, if you're a Democrat, stereotypically, you're pro-choice and anti-capital punishment (so once you clear the womb, you're safe). And if you're a Republican, stereotypically, you're anti-abortion and pro-capital punishment (so you'll get a chance to leave the womb, but if you screw up, they'll get you eventually).

But what if you're pro-choice and pro-capital punishment (besides being a death-monger)? Conversely, what if you're anti-abortion and anti-capital punishment (it's life for everybody, even if we don't have the room)? There is no real place for you. You have to choose A or B. The middle ground is, remarkably, frowned upon.

It's counter-intuitive for a country and a culture that has made a habit of pushing boundaries and being daring, to simply confine its political system to a us versus them mentality. George Washington (you may know him as the Father of our Country) said in his farewell address not to get bog down by the calamity of political parties. Something along the lines of, "It serves to distract the public councils, and enfeeble the public administration... agitates the community with ill-founded jealousies and false alarms... kindles the animosity of one against another... it opens the door to foreign influence and corruption." In other words, political parties = bad.

There is no way that political parties will up and vanish (there's just too much money involved), so maybe we should look and opening it up to have more parties, and dare I say more participation. Yes, having another major party suddenly presents the possibility that no one party with have a majority, but is that a bad thing, especially if it encourages coalition and cooperation between parties.

People never thought they would see a black president in their lifetime. It happened, and we're better for it. People never think they will see a viable third party in their lifetime. Maybe their wrong about that, too.

So I ask you (especially if you're a voting U.S. citizen), why must we choose between going left or right? Why don't we select a third option and go... forward.

What's Up!

February 16, 2009


url: http://whatsup.dmounited.com/x/2009-0216.html

In the coming weeks, Major League Soccer will announce the next two expansion teams to join the league. MLS has its detractors, but this is a small growing league, that's been doing all the right things, and 5 cities are begging to bring the MLS to their backyard.

Despite the economic landscape, MLS is showing to be a safe bet (just check out Amway's new shirt sponsorship of the San Jose Earthquakes). And logic would dictate that if you weather this, just imagine what benefits await when the rebound happens (not that I'm betting that's anytime soon, but that's a different show). The five cities that want to be in Major League Soccer are: Miami, Florida; St. Louis, Missouri; Portland, Oregon; Vancouver, British Columbia; & Ottawa, Ontario.

What two cities would I, personally, think best for expansion? Portland and Vancouver.
What two cities do I think will end up with teams? Portland and St. Louis.
What two cities do most people think will get the teams? Miami and St. Louis.

So let me break down each city's chances (in alphabetical order), because there really is nothing to do between now and the announcement than speculate.

MIAMI: Many people think this is as close to an automatic pick as possible. Mainly because it will be backed by the money of Spanish giants, FC Barcelona. Not to mention that it will be co-owned by a South American telecommunications mogul, and there is money to burn. Add in the fact that they'll be in a large Latin community, and this has all the markings of a match made in heaven.

Here's why it won't work. And it's for 3 simple reasons.
One) While Miami is home to a large Latin community, it isn't Central or South American, it's Caribbean. And their sport of choice: baseball. If Major League Baseball's Florida Marlins haven't won over the community (despite two World Series wins in only 16 years of existence), what chance does a soccer team have.

Miami Fusion FCTwo) Not to burst anyone's bubble, but MLS was already in Miami and that team was contracted. The Miami Fusion played for a 5 seasons, then got the plug pulled by the league. The number one reason cited for their failure was that the team actually played in Fort Lauderdale, roughly 30 miles from downtown Miami. To put things in perspective, when the Los Angeles Galaxy moved from the Rose Bowl to the Home Depot Center, roughly 30 miles away, people made the trip with them. This may be the #1 reason MLS doesn't expand here again.

Three) FC Barcelona has said, on record, that they want to brand the new franchise as Barcelona, to help spread the FC Barcelona brand to North America. That's great and all, but how does that help MLS? It doesn't. This reeks of Chivas all over again. Chivas USA is pretty much the junior varsity squad for CD Guadalajara in Mexico. In fact, most of Chivas' fans are fans of the mother team in Mexico. They don't appeal to the local fans, because the local fans are Galaxy fans. Does the league want to have a Barcelona JV squad traveling across the country promoting the Spanish club's interests over the league's? My hunch says no.

OTTAWA: The forgotten entry in this race. Ottawa's prospect is high, solely because the guy bidding is the owner of the NHL Ottawa Senators. But there are two reasons when Ottawa won't make the cut.

One) The Ottawa city council will vote to fund one stadium: a new Canadian Football League stadium, or a new MLS stadium. Not both. Not that I have any knowledge on the inner working of Ottawa's city council, but my money says that the council will back the CFL stadium. Although the Canadian capital would gain international recognition with a MLS team, the residents may prefer supporting a truly Canadian venture in the CFL. With no MLS stadium, this bid is toast.

Two) There is no way that the two Canadian cities will get both expansion slots (most likely, neither will get one). However, if the MLS were to add a second Canadian team, it would be in Vancouver (see below).

Portland Timbers
PORTLAND: The town is called Soccer Town, U.S.A. The people of this town are loyal supporters of the Portland Timbers (a second tier soccer team, much like the Seattle Sounders were). Soccer is so loved in this town, that the aforementioned Portland Timbers have existed in some form of pro soccer since 1975. Strangely, this bid has little to no flaws, and if MLS opts to expand to only one city in the Pacific Northwest, it'll be Portland. Of course, not one bid is a lock (Portland may have stadium issues), so Portland waits with baited breath.

ST. LOUIS: This town is another soccer hotbed, that will be fielding a new team in the new Women's Professional Soccer (which will be called St. Louis Athletica. Really.) All things being equal, MLS would expand here in a heartbeat. But things are not equal. There are 1 1/2 things that could derail this bid.

One) Despite a decent ownership group, it apparently is missing a deep-pocketed rich guy that the league would prefer to have as an co-owner. If the economy continues to blow, MLS is worried that money will dry up and this franchise will devolve into the league's version of the NBA Clippers. From what I've read, this is a big sticky wicket for the league, so the Gateway City shouldn't hold its breath, just yet.

One.Five) This team would be share the state of Missouri with the Kansas City Wizards (a questionable franchise in its own right). Yes, the new owners of the Wiz are committed to the city, but this team is on shaky ground and will be until it has its own stadium. Does the league want two deadbeat teams in the same state? Sure, both Kansas City and St. Louis have the huge upside and potential to be model franchises, but does the league want to take the chance.

VANCOUVER: This is the darkhorse bid. It has a fantastc ownership group, including NBA MVP Steve Nash, and a passionate fan base. The only thing that is going against Vancouver is that Vancouver is in Canada. MLS is chasing dollars and despite parity a few months back, the U.S. dollar is worth more than the Canadian one. However, if St. Louis fails to get another rich man onboard, and Portland takes an unforeseen dive, Vancouver is the best choice.

Truthfully, the best choice would be both Portland and Vancouver to get the expansion teams, as that would be the best for soccer on the continent, but is a money-driven world, with the recent expansion into Seattle, does MLS add these two cities, bringing a total of 3 expansion teams within a 160 mile radius? Probably not. I think MLS will add one more team from the Northwest, but it'll be the U.S. one.

Those are the five cities vying for MLS action. Start wagering.

What's Up!

February 1, 2009


My brain is cluttered. Always has been, always will be. That's a fact of life I have already come to expect will follow me wherever I go. Now, as we've said time and again, "The probability that I could know everything is well within the realm of possibility." Unfortunately, all that information in my melon isn't organized (throw in a couple of head traumas and I don't think it can ever be), and subsequently, the way I go about my business isn't either. This could also explain why my physical surroundings are also cluttered. However, the Mrs. and I have come up with a way to help get us our lives a little more organized and, most importantly, clutter-free.

We figure that if we can take a proactive approach to organizing the way we think, things will be better. And who doesn't want things better? The end result: we're planning our endeavors like a military campaign. Seriously. The military is known for their discipline, maybe I could use a little.

In every major engagement, military strategists concoct an array of operations which will help achieve the end goal. And within each operation is a series of objectives that need to be completed. We're doing something similiar. We've strategized on how we can achieve our end goals and have concocted our own set of operations to reach them, and in the process de-clutter our minds... well, mainly mine.

How many operations? Seven. That's right, seven. As we hammered out what we need to achieve in the immediate future, we discovered that there are seven major operations that we needed to tackle. What are they? What's the ultimate objective of each operation? That, unfortunately, is classified.

The downside is that this list was formalized in October and only two ops have been completed, so far. At this point, we should have at least 3 ops completed with work started on at least two others. This isn't the case. To be fair, it was an ambitious plan to complete all 7 by their designated D-Days, and it's been coupled with minor emergencies that have arisen that required our immediate attention. However, if you look at the big picture, we haven't strayed too far off course of what we need to do, and all of them could be completed soon.

The irony in using the military as a model is that I'm a self-proclaimed pacifist.

Let's also note that maybe God doesn't want my brain uncluttered. Can you imagine, just in property damage alone, if my intellect was razor sharp? I can. Just wow. Although, I could finalize some interesting theories in the field of astrophysics that could turn the scientific community upside-down (and I'm really close as it is).

But just to show how apropos this edition of What's Up! is, I had a big finish in mind for this piece, and I lost it somewhere in my head. Great.

What's Up!

January 10, 2009


url: http://whatsup.dmounited.com/x/2009-0110.html

The most important and holiest day on the Dmo-Valerian Calendar isn't a birthday or a wedding anniversary. No, it's January 8th, and it's called Heathrow Day. The reason why it's important: that's the day when me and Val meet, in person, for the very first time. It was at London's Heathrow Airport. That's right, London... as in London, England. I flew in from Los Angeles, and she flew in from Norfolk, Virginia. You're reading that correctly. We both lived in North America, through on opposite coasts, and met for the first time in Europe. Neat, uh? If you want to full story behind our meeting, ask me and I'll tell you. It's quite the epic.

Lord Nelson
Lord Nelson atop his Column
in Trafalgar Square, London
We didn't plan on romance. But there was a connection. Though we had known each other online as friends for about a year, once we met and travelled across England, it was like we had been close friends for years. We were super-comfortable with each other right from the get go, which made the experience of being in London even better, because I had a great friend to share it with.

And if you don't know what followed, she moved to Los Angeles, we dated for a while, and we got married. She was going to move out here anyway, even if we had not met in London, but we both agree that if not for our British adventure, we probably wouldn't be where we are now. But we did meet in London, in the most improbable of scenarios, and the rest, as the kids say, is history.

So two days ago, we celebrated the 10th anniversary of Heathrow Day. And for me, it was truly an occasion worth celebrating (if you subscribe to the alternate realities theory, this decision to go to London would be one of my three major divergence points). And where did we celebrate? The Olde Ship in Fullerton, a British pub. Good place; good food.

Here's a quick snapshot of how significant Heathrow Day is to my existence. This is a partial list of the things and places I would not have experienced had it not been for the direct involvement of Valerie in my life: And that's not even the half of it. But you can see why the day is so important to us... so important to me. And let's not even get into the whole Zoe thing.

So when I talk about Heathrow Day, and how it involves the most important thing to happen to me, now you know what I'm talking about.

If you want to check out a detail of our London adventure, head on over to london.worldofdemosthenes.com

And for anyone else out there who's wondering if something this remarkable might happen to you, never be afraid to take the most random of chances, and never discount the most improbable of scenarios.

What's Up!

December 7, 2008


I'm not sure what upside-down bizarro would we've living in, but let me share something that I thought was downright AMAZING!

Seven months ago: I give $20 to the guy at my local gas station (or petrol station for those on the continent) and would fill my tank about halfway.
Three days ago: I give $20 to the same guy. I fill my tank, and then go back inside TO GET CHANGE!

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

Of course, one could argue that we started living in bizarro world when I cranked out a child (when I say "I," I mean "Val." We all know I did nothing).

But check this: Russia, now a supremely capitalist nation, is rolling in money (thanks to oil, despite prices). Meanwhile, the United States has to bail out (and possibly take ownership) in banks, auto manufacturers, insurance carriers, to name a few, turning it into a socialist state. That's what we call role reversal. Bizarro.

Qantas passengers flying from Melbourne to Los Angeles over the weekend had an unexpected delay caused by a dog. The dog, which was in the cargo hold, chewed through some cables which grounded the plane forcing a one-day layover. Bizarro.

City officials are planning on cutting the number of brothels in Amsterdam's legendary red light district in half. Deputy Mayor Lodewijk Asscher said that the changes would be more in line with Amsterdam's image as a "tolerant and crazy place." What? Bizarro.

According to police reports, a Malaysian man has been stabbed to death for refusing to stop singing and hand over the microphone at a karaoke bar. This happened a bar in Sandakan in eastern Borneo. Apparently, dude pissed off some people off by hogging the stage. He was attacked, and the fight spilled out on to the street. He was punched before being stabbed to death with a knife. For fucking karaoke? Bizarro.

I guess what I'm saying is that this new bizarro world is different from the bizarro world of last week, which was different from the bizarro world of last month. Things are changing quickly people. As they say, "Nothing is true; everything is permitted," so best to keep your head on a swivel from here on out.

What's Up!

December 3, 2008


As of 6:04 p.m., Pacific Standard Time, on December 1, 2008, it is officially the Christmas season. The call was made when Valerie heard Jose Feliciano's Feliz Navidad/I Wanna Wish You a Merry Christmas on the radio for the first time this year. As is tradition, it can only be called the Christmas season once that song is heard over the airwaves.

On that note (no pun intended), have a Merry Christmas everyone!

What's Up!

September 28, 2008


url: http://whatsup.dmounited.com/x/2008-0928.html

I find myself increasingly dissatisfied with television. Mainly because there is nothing on, when I am watching it. Yes, there are many good television programs currently on the airwaves, but often are put on at the same time as networks battle it out for ratings. That's great for whoever it's great for, but tonight I was reduced to watching a House marathon on USA and an Ace of Cakes marathon on Food Network. Which would have been fine had I not already seen these episodes before as I tend to watch them when they are first run.

So I have turned off the television (which is a recurrent activity nowadays), and turned on some tunes. Instead of listening to my current selection of music, I have lately been turning on one of the Radio streams in iTunes, and 9 times of out of 10, I tune into Absolutely Smooth Jazz on Sky.fm, like I am currently doing. The 10th time, it's Secret Agent on SomaFM (it's under "Eclectic"). The baby's asleep. My lady is at the Salt Mine (funny note, as you know, she and I work at the same place, and when anyone from there calls my cell, it comes up at "Salt Mine." It really does.). So before I crack open some Full Tilt Poker, I'm going to sit here and ramble.

Why Does TV Suck?
Did you see the Emmys? Neither did I. But when your Best Drama is AMC's Mad Men, you know you've got a problem. Never seen the show, but I've heard it's good. But that's the thing. No one has seen the show. And it's on basic cable. When the over-the-air networks can't field a winning show... that's a problem.

Truth be told, I'm not a network executive, but... I don't know where I was going with that. It's still true, though: I am not a network executive.

What I Like
It should be no surprise to people that know me that my favorite channels are: Discovery, History, History International, National Geographic, Science Channel, Food Network, Fox Soccer Channel, the ESPNs, and SciFi. Maybe it would. Does anyone really know me? I am kinda enigmatic. Chicks dig that.

Stream of Consciousness
It's amazing how I start to actually ramble when I don't plan this thing out.

But I'll keep typing along... I might spout off some mathematical proof that'll win me the Nobel Prize ('cause we all know how prone I am to just drop equations in the middle of What's Up!).

Isn't It Ironic
If my little plan in my head bears fruit, this whole issue will reek of irony. What's this plan? Not saying. New DMO United company policy: no talking about plans until they are in production. This one's still in development, so you'll just have to wait. :-P

Wow. Did I Just Use an Emoticon?
What am I, 14? That, my friends, may be a signal that I'm scraping the bottom of the ol' "creative" barrel.

I've Been Saving This
Upon downloading the album of the Rockabye Baby!: Lullaby Renditions of U2, I got this cool album cover (U2 fans will get it. Non-fans won't. Don't worry about it). I kept telling myself that I was going to post it on What's Up! Here's as good a time as any. The lullaby versions are really just muzak versions, which I guess is OK if you're trying to put a kid to sleep. But my kid falls asleep listening to hard rock. Guns-N-Roses puts her out every time. Curious.

Rockabye Baby

John Muir Once Wrote...
"And the winds, too, were singing in wild accord, playing on every tree and rock, surging against the huge brows and domes and outstanding battlements, deflected hither and thither and broken into a thousand cascading, roaring currents in the canyons, and low bass, drumming swirls in the hallows... This was the most sublime waterfall flood I ever saw - clouds, winds, rocks, waters, throbbing together as one. And then to contemplate what was going on simultaneously with all this in other mountain temples; the Big Tuolumne Canyon - how the white waters and the winds were singing there! And in Hetch Hetchy Valley and the great King's River yosemite, and in all the other Sierra canyons, and valleys from Shasta to the southernmost fountains of the Kern, thousands of rejoicing flood waterfalls chanting together in jubilee dress."

There is a book entitled "Meditations of John Muir" on my desk. I thought I'd share. I know, I'm a giver.

Chuang Tzu Once Wrote...
"Words are like the wind and the waves... flow with whatever may happen and let you mind be free; stay centered."

A little bonus to go with Muir.

My daughter, Zoe, may end up speaking three languages by the time she reaches pre-school. She gets English from her mom, Greek from her grandparents, and authentic frontier gibberish from me.

I used to be tri-lingual myself. However, I forgotten all my German. Gone. I joke that I've forgotten more German than most people will ever learn. Too bad that's more of a fact than a joke.

Ok, I think I'm done rambling. I think I'm going to join my snoozing baby.

What's Up Archive
February 2008 - September 2008
August 2007 - December 2007
February 2007 - July 2007
August 2006 - December 2006
March 2006 - July 2006
September 2005 - February 2006
February 2005 - August 2005
September 2004 - January 2005
April 2004 - August 2004
January 2004 - March 2004
August 2003 - December 2003
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September 2002 - January 2003
April 2002 - August 2002
November 2001 - March 2002

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